Rant-ro-nomicon Vol. 1: #13 - # 9

Okay, I think it is time to go over what has been pissing me off lately. Quite a bit has, and it 's time to air out the dirty laundry.

#13: Having to pay over $6 a pack for cigarettes.

Okay, first thing you are probably going to say is "If you don't like the price, then don't smoke," and if you were going to say that... spare me! I've heard that a million times and it's gotten incredibly old. Believe me, I am trying to quit, but I'm waiting for my wisdom tooth surgery to get a jump on it. But I digress.

What the state bigwigs are saying is that the additional taxes on them are going to go towards child health care. I am all for child health care (what heartless bastard isnt'??), as I am most social programs. But, let me venture this question:

"Why does it always have to be placed on the breaking back of the smokers?"

Is it because smoking is initially harmful and they are trying to send a message that smoking is bad? News flash, smoking is basically breathing fire, OF COURSE IT IS GOING TO BE BAD! But, there are so many other things that are just as bad for you that could be taxed. Case in point: Fast Food.

Fast food is not only incredibly harmful for you, but people eat it so often in this day and age that it has become a harmful habit. Just like smoking, fast food is bad for your general health, especially your heart (and they are probably about equal if you don't watch your intake). Yet, they market it to children... Way to go on taking care of our next generation, Corporate America! I will admit, I do eat fast food, but I try to avoid it when I honestly can. And if they were to tax it, yes, I'd pay the extra so I can get my coronary-on-a-bun and get right back to work, just like everyone else.

This leads me to thinking, the demographic of smokers is 18 years old and above. If they were thinking fiscally, it would be more financially prudent to tax fast food because the purchasing of fast food is all inclusive. This would also mean they wouldn't have to tax nearly as high, since the number of people paying the taxes on double-bacon heart attacks in a day would be greater since there isn't an age restriction on it. Not only would this garner more state revenue, it would also take a lot of the pressure off of the smokers!

Just like eating fast food, smoking is a personal choice. So is drinking. So is caffeine consumption (a choice I make VERY often). The list goes on and on. And, just like the immortal film "Thank You For Smoking" teaches, all these choices have consequences. I smoke, therefore I accept the consequences.

After all that, I need a smoke a thirty-five cent cigarette. And while I'm doing that, you can whip out your calculators and see how much a pack costs.

#12 Cage fighting (or MMA, or whatever the hell they're calling it these days)

Okay, now that I have successfully put another hole into my wallet, on to my next rant.

As you know, analogies of the USA being likened to a modern Roman empire have been flying around for as long as I can remember. But, in recent years, the analogies have only been made stronger with the advent of "Mixed Martial Arts."

First off, I've trained in the martial arts for a good portion of my life (purple belt in Kempo if you simply MUST know), and most of what I have seen used in the octagon is not martial arts. Part of me should be insulted that they include Martial Arts in the acronym, but why get angry over what I cannot change when I can laugh at them because of this little story.

I've seen some martial artists compete in UFC, but they went right back to K1 because they said beating MMA fighters was too easy.

Yup, too easy. They even showed real martial artists wiping the floor with cage fighters on the show "Human Weapon" on the History Channel. Wow, when the History Channel can school your ass, you know you're outclassed.

Back to the "Rome" analogy. Many people have said that cage fighting is the modern equivalent of gladitorial combat. In some ways, that can be true. A lot of the amateur/semi-pro cage fighers I've met (and summarily had to dispel a fight they were involved in at my old job) are fresh out of jail. Well, one can say that at least they are taking their violent tendencies to a legal forum, but that leads to even further questions. Should that be glorified.

I would like to think that the UFC wasn't founded with the intention of inspiring convicts to knock the shit out of eachother for the entertainment of the NASCAR shirt-clad lumpenproletariat. But, what has spawned in its wake has wrought a new generation of knuckledragging idiocy.

Wasn't professional wrestling enough to satisfiy the collective Id? Though I'm not a fan of that either, but at least that takes genuine training.

Jeez, if I need my violence fix, I'll watch hockey. It's a lot more fun, anyways.

#11: Megan Fox being mentioned EVERY FIVE SECONDS!

Okay, I know that mentioning my lamentations towards that only mentions her again, but I'm wiling to say this, just this once.

Megan Fox is attractive, in a sense (my type is more a mix between Audrey Hepburn and the Suicide Girls), but does she need to be mentioned every five seconds?

I hate to say this about a beautiful woman, but she's going to be considered annoying and won't be successful anymore if the overexposure doesn't stop. She'll just be another "it" girl in the media, and I don't want to see that. She's not a peroxide-blonde airhead like prior "it" girls, and Megan Fox doesn't deserve to be lumped with that.

Still, hearing about her all the time is starting to get REALLY annoying.

#10: People who have their iPod earbuds in constantly.

I'm sure that reading THAT in a musician's blog is odd, but let me plead my case.

I do own an iPod. I do use it. But, not all the time.

Even with as close as humanity is becoming with the global village of the internet, the outside world is an utter contrast. The real world can seem like less like a collective of humanity, and more a collective of automatons, cables attached to deatch yourself.

You would expect to actually talk to people as you are walking through campus day to day, but this is becoming less common. How can you talk to someone, let alone a friend of yours, when they have those white cables dangling from their ears? I know you can turn it down if you simply feel you have to (sorry for penetrating your shield from reality), but I guess I'm old fashioned when I say having those in while I'm speaking to you is rude.

Granted, I love having an iPod. And if I talk to someone, I take my earbuds out.

#9 Burning my hand when I use my straightening iron.

No real rant here, it just hurts!

More to come later.

~The Bat /\V/\